Archive for September, 2010

I have this girlfriend who spends quite a bit of our time together being critical. 

If I share something cool that I’ve done or am getting ready to do, she’ll remind me that I’m probably not as successful as I think.  That always gives me pause.  Which is probably good for me, right?  She’s usually willing, when I ask, to tell me the ways I haven’t met my goals and high standards (which she shares, too), despite my efforts.  She can be relentless in her pursuit of perfection.  And I find myself buying right into it, even though it usually feels kinda yucky.

But all in all, she isn’t unkind.  We are seriously bonded friends and I think that for the most part she has my best interest at heart. 

Besides, we’ve been dear friends for as long as I can remember. 

It isn’t so easy to just stop being friends with someone like her.  She’s very cool and popular, she makes me laugh, and she’s always there for me.  Really, she is.  There were many times I felt like no one was on my side and she would be the one who was there for me.  Still, she tends to be critical and judgmental.  Always with an eye towards self-improvement and doing what’s best (supposedly). 

Do you know the kind of friend I’m talking about?

I can’t be the only one who has a friend like that, can I?  I don’t think I am.  But guess what?  Read the rest of this entry »

Ah the glory days. 

Or the not-so-glory days.  Either way, those days are gone, girlfriend. 

Who you were and what you did last year or last decade or back-in-the-day is no more.  Yep, you heard me. 

Today is the day to start fresh.  Redefine yourself. 

Toss out those antiquated ideas you have about yourself and look excitedly inward and forward to see who you really are.  Today. 

Who are you today? 

Take a minute and reflect on that. 

Most often, when we answer the question “who am I?” we’re quick to Read the rest of this entry »

If you’re curious to know why you connect instantly and deeply with some people and not others, I suggest you read this interesting offering from Ori Brafman and Rom Brafman, “Click: The Magic of Instant Connections.”  The brothers Brafman have wondered themselves what makes some people click.  They wanted to know what it meant and how to get more of it.  Hence, their book. 

The key aspects they elaborate on are 1) Magic matters, 2) There’s power in vulnerability, 3) A few feet make a big difference, 4) Resonance begets resonance, 5) Similarity counts; quantity trumps quality, 6) The environment around us can help foster intimacy, 7) Certain people are magnets, and Quick-set intimacy can bring out the best in us. 

In summary, they eloquently state that if we learn to foster those cool connections in our life “it can change the very nature of a relationship – not just at that moment but forever after.  It can help us to achieve our best selves.”  Lofty aspirations.  But it seems doable when I read their ideas. 

Here’s to connections!
~Margie